trashkore@yahoo.com

Asian punk from a Malaysian perspective
site of the month!!!
casual banter :-)

haha.
KL was fun. except the part where we got ripped off all the time.

Your English Skills:

Grammar: 80%

Punctuation: 60%

Spelling: 60%

Vocabulary: 40%

P A F . F A Y
yes i'm back. after almost a year in the shadows. been to busy. what's up with my life. freelancing as usual.

no hope for punk. no hope for theater. no hope for love. no hope for life. no hope for death. no hope for existence.

punk as fuck. fucked as you.

space to breathe...
finally a little time to blog. been fucking busy as of late. you know me. when i'm free i'm too free when i'm busy i'm hardly seen.

juggling the day job to pay the bills and to help out for some upcoming expenses in this household. thankfully the day job is flexible, as in i get to choose my own hours. it had better be anyway because the pay is shit. also juggling some acting-filming assignments (which pays a lot better!) and have some writing and planning to do. so much for a 'useless, lazy, no-school no-career bummer'.

space to breathe...
finally a little time to blog. been fucking busy as of late. you know me. when i'm free i'm too free when i'm busy i'm hardly seen.

juggling the day job to pay the bills and to help out for some upcoming expenses in this household. thankfully the day job is flexible, as in i get to choose my own hours. it had better be anyway because the pay is shit. also juggling some acting-filming assignments (which pays a lot better!) and have some writing and planning to do. so much for a 'useless, lazy, no-school no-work bummer'.

no beats necessary
baybeats was lame. too much security, and the statement beside the photo gallery was shit. textbook art i call. but to be fair some good bands performed. and some over rated bad ones. and some dumb ass rock star shit going on too.

aspidistra fly was the only one i came for. and they rocked me into a world of bliss. woohoo.

at least i got to meet my buddies from Bangkok who came over for the event. and hang out with the clowns. many hot chicks there too though. fine so now i'm sexist for saying that. whatever.

i need a sugar momma

define 'definition'
so yesterday was spent attending two makan sessions. first was Catherine's and Audrey's "Happy birthday" meet up. Pastamania really had some good cheap food. went with the whiner-diers...pretty alright.

then i rushed off for the Sennett "Reunion" ad hoc makan at Breeks. fucking place was packed but we managed to cramp all of us (almost 20!!!) into the place albeit seperated into 3 tables. the Manager at Breeks Taka was really nice and accomodating. fucking respect the guy and the staff for being patient and nice despite having like 300 mouths to entertain. i'll go back surely. but it was really nice to meet those Sennettians again, some after the whole of 10 years. some remained their same funny selves while the rest looked like they had a makeover. whatever it is, it was really nice, overwhelming and moving to see the bonds of friendship (or at least that of acquaintance) are still intact. even got a Yahoogroups done! really looking forward to the next meet up. hopefully within the next 12 months.

now it's time for the Secondary school fuckanadens. hahaha.

the foodplus crew is slowly deteriorating. no one seems to meet up on Saturdays anymore. one by one they all fall down...into National service.... (sing it to the tune of Martika's "Toy Soldiers").

uncouth youth
listening to my old SHELTER albums recently have been fun times. suddenly whatever they preached became relevant, if not more than ever before. or maybe because despite their strong Hare Krishna standing, some topics they discuss are of the same wavelength as my beliefs.

slimming ads and corporate ads are everywhere now, lulling people into a FALSE sense of security. yes yes we know money makes the world go round and accentuates at least a superficial sense of security BUT people seem to forget that money does not define everything. hence work becomes part of the parcel, hell its actually depicted as something good! work is actually just legal slavery, you selling out your time so you can earn money to feed the mechanisms of this capitalist juggernaut? whatever happened to pure, simple, costless (or maybe not-so-costly) living? whatever happened to the concepts of playing, of enjoying, of revelling? insecure people trying to trim down, most teetering to the brink of insipidity just to look good. hell everyone wants to look good. even me. but for what? what takes? what gives? what fucking forsakes? it's not merely wanting to look good per se, but WHY? to fit into society? while at the same time advocating the vessels of a so-called individuality? torturing yourself, freeing yourself from a comfortable hideout so you can fit into a more comfortable, yet pretentious mold of mass social scum?

then again your life. your problem.

work sucks but we need the bucks.

windchime
just began work at Braddell. some recycling company sideline thingie. pay sucks but i dont have a choice. pay will increase over time supposedly. then again i'm also doing something eco-friendly. the people i work with are nice. no airs no attitudes. even the boss.

chick of the day : Desiree Ann Siahan. woohoo

incognito...
so shahdhaly got married just now. dang. one of the old guys from the old neighbourhood. seems just yesterday we were with the rest of the bunch kicking a ball around the void deck of 117. the reception was typical malay void deck stuff, but with an extra front tentage (not cheap canvas but gray-bordering-on-silver type) for the food. really good mix of malay, western and indian food and snacks. even went up to our old block with my dad and just relived some memories. i knocked on my old neighbour's door to say hello. memories...they induce the mellower emotions. i miss being a kid. even if it means living in haunted quiet old Potong Pasir.

finally i found a replacement for The Past. or have i? then again as usual, circumstances will derail the flow of things.

kwan loong medicated oil. the choice of the old generation... hahaha!

sunday bloody sunday
hello. Repercussions was alright, i went with Hix and only Hix cos Izzar buey-ed. kinda funny, it seemed boring at first but i got the hang of it. jazz funk soul. i wanted to go for Breaks and DnB at centro but i didnt have any free passes....UNTIL....i found out like 3 hours ago they had the SMS-for-free-entry thing. argh. * Subvert was pretty much alright too, as was Re con struct before that. * the depressed feeling i had growing up came back to me again 2 or 3 days back. its the sudden emptiness. i have no explanation whatsoever for it, or maybe i'm just broke. * never expect. never assume. and never expect to assume. and just so you know i can never fit into your lifestyle, so dont twist my arm yea?

back from the dead.
i know its been really long since i last blogged. but i never really bothered to do so the past few months for a myriad of reasons. life has been pretty much alright past few months, had my fair share of ups and downs. * tension is brewing in the home. an indirect result of the current state of the country. the depression is seeping in. * met many many new people the past few months. some online, some real life, some became real life friends after knowing them online. some have struck a chord in my heartstrings (no i'm not being some senseless emo whiner) by being really great people in their own respects, some have pissed me off because they are such assholes, while some hang finely in between. * still freelancing. Toyo has become my flagship "back up company". no money, call Toyo, work as janitor, fuck off. had a shoot just now. was fun. the money helped pay some bill. but the shoot tomorrow has been rescheduled. groan. * striving to attain perfection is an act of madness. you'll end up so keen to maintain perfection you lose all sense of self.

sigh...kanjiong
IT'S JUST A FUCKING BILL. whatever hiccups there are YOU STILL HAVE THE RECEIPT. can you not keep grumbling and rumbling? arrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhh......

tembak langit
so i was at localized @ zouk on saturday. free passes courtesy of jean. i went with zam, hosni and zool. berd begged to come along and i didnt let him! hahaha! because well, he called late and always prone to sudden urges to go home early. and he calls me faggy. then i realized jean had many many many more passes. by then it was after 10 and barely minutes away from invalid state. i wanted to call berd and tell him he could come but 1) no way would he make it in time 2) he would scream at me and i didnt want to go deaf, definitely not at 10pm! so berd...sorry ah! i owe you a (cheap asian) drink. think yeos soya bean or something. * anyway the place was filled with social scum. im thinking at least 500 revellers within sight alone, and hundreds more i didnt see. reiki's set rocked but phuture gets so cramped when she was spinning. so all i caught was the sounds from the entrance. she then caught me, ray and kenneth dancing to trance! eh hello i ahbeng dance influenced ok! * dnb went into hardcore mode at 2am with Kiat and Vortex and MC sleepwalker. fucking ace. plus bumped into so many people and made quite a few friends. and saw many old ones whom i thought were dead. i never had so much fun at zouk. i miss the drum n bass saturdays of union square though. and please, dont ever call me a clubber. because i'm not.

i'll be honest. i wished i got Aragorn instead...

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shut up and stay up
i know i said new year resolutions are dumb. and i'd like to still think so. but i find myself staying home more ever since shang ri la. and im actually organizing myself. hc punk wise though. is it all a coincidence? never making new resolutions might be the successful new resolution after all. or maybe i should just shut up instead of pondering over the irony.

work sucks but i need the bucks
so i will head back to work on the 21st. looking forward to the moolah. will be away again late march. * had a funny dream just now. this chinese girl who i have never seen was lying on me in a translucent shirt and i could see her nipples. then we ate at some indian foodcourt with her family. why dont i get a normal wet dream like everyone else? did i tell you that last week i dreamt of playing in the same band as GG Allin? who nearly whacked me up in the dream because i sided with our band mate. and who, in real life is lying dead somewhere.

let me out of this tightness
help. fucking place is getting more and more expensive. found out somethings over the weekend that made me a little depressed. nothing personal. mainly financial. and many times more cautioned is what i should be. * i will probably be touring a lot next 2 years, working a lot, saving a lot. cutting down on going out. which is good. you can never have too much money in singapore. * parents showing signs of stress and depression. and not only mine. give us some empathy oh big brother! * have guests this month. fun!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
well 2003 passed by real fast for me. the year didnt suck, apart from the SARS, the war and the god damn rise in taxes. well it didnt suck so bad! i know its depressive times but in no way am i going to dwell beneath the pile of shit. what i never understood was new year resolutions. i never made any, unless they were in jest. and probably never will. plus i will probably never achieve them anyway. why the fuck do you people even bother? waiting for a new year just to make a change or a deed in your life? why not start last week? or, say, august 19th? or april 21st? why january 1? then again thats what makes people funny and interesting - opinions. and you know what's ironic? i always feel mentally fresh on the 1st of January. i "feel" the new year and the new energy. good lah. i always get depressed every year end. oh well.

did the usual chill out thing at the Padang with the guys yesterday...

well what else can i say? happy fucking new year everyone!

::if punk ever mattered to you::
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